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You're Not Crazy: A Podcast for Cycle Breakers with Toxic Parents
Psychotherapist and Coach, Torie Wiksell, is no stranger to talking about challenging and dysfunctional family dynamics. In addition to specializing in working with the adult children of parents with borderline and narcissistic personality disorders as both a therapist and coach, Torie grew up with a mother who had an unmanaged personality disorder.
Torie has spent a significant portion of her 12 year career as a therapist working with clients with personality disorders, their partners, and family members, and brings a unique and relatable perspective to navigating these complicated relationships.
Follow Torie on Instagram: instagram.com/torieatconfidentboundaries
Learn more about Coaching and the Confident Boundaries Membership: www.confidentboundaries.com
Disclaimer: This podcast is not therapy. If you are in mental health crisis, please contact the Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988.
You're Not Crazy is a podcast owned and produced by Torie Wiksell and Confident Boundaries, LLC.
Episodes
50 episodes
Breaking Cycles Without Breaking Yourself
Healing isn’t linear—especially when you’re the cycle breaker. In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, I’m pulling back the curtain on what real, sustainable healing looks like when you grew up with emotionally immature, narcissistic, or ...
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Episode 51
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38:24
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What If Protecting Yourself Is the Honest Thing to Do?
Cycle breakers are often raised to believe that honesty = full disclosure and transparency… even when the other person has a history of weaponizing that honesty against them.In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we’re digging int...
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Episode 50
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15:14
Guilt-Tripped Again? How Toxic Parents Keep You Under Control
If you’ve ever felt a pit in your stomach after setting a boundary… or a wave of guilt for saying no to your parent’s last-minute demand… this episode is for you.Guilt has been weaponized in toxic families for generations—and if...
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Episode 49
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16:13
Are You Putting Out Fires or Breaking the Cycle?
Let’s talk about the real work of breaking dysfunctional family cycles.If you're the adult child of a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, you probably know the drill: chaos explodes, you search frantical...
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Episode 48
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24:42
My Parent Can't Really Be a Narcissist, Right?
Do you question whether your parent actually is as toxic as they feel sometimes? Then this episode is for you.Today, I’m diving into why so many adult children of narcissistic or borderline parents minimize their trauma, second-guess the...
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Episode 47
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17:29
"But They're Your Parent": Toxic Things People Say to Cycle Breakers
Surviving (not thriving) Mother's Day weekend is what we're celebrating this week. Breaking cycles isn’t about perfection—it’s about progress. Your commitment to healing, despite few healthy examples, is powerful. Be gentle with yourself; your ...
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Episode 46
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18:39
The Gray Area: Understanding Low Contact with Toxic Parents
Stuck between staying in a painful relationship with your toxic parent or going full no-contact? There is another option—low contact. In this episode, I break down what low contact actually looks like with a parent who has borderline o...
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Episode 45
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25:18
The Enabling Parent: Things Are Complicated with Your "Healthy" Parent
Have you ever wondered why your "healthier" parent never stepped in to protect you? In this episode, I’m pulling back the curtain on the complex role of the enabling parent—one who may seem less toxic than the other but still plays a significan...
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Episode 44
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24:52
Untangling Codependency When You’re Always the Emotional Fixer
If you grew up with a parent who had narcissistic or borderline personality disorder, codependency can sneak into your adult relationships without you even realizing it. What started as a necessary survival strategy—keeping the peace, reading t...
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Episode 43
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21:03
Navigating Emotions After Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family
Ever been told to "sit with your emotions" but had no idea what that really means? If you grew up in a dysfunctional family, you’re not alone. In this episode, I break down this common advice into three practical steps that you can use, no matt...
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Episode 42
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18:33
Being the Scapegoat S*cks: Here's How to Break That Cycle
In this episode, I’m diving into the complex and painful role of the scapegoat child in families with borderline or narcissistic parents. If you were always the one blamed for everything—while somehow also being expected to keep the pe...
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Episode 41
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17:59
Want to Save Your Relationship with Your Toxic Parent? Try This.
In this episode, we explore the difficult—but crucial—question: When is no-contact with a borderline or narcissistic parent necessary? This isn’t about pushing you toward cutting ties, but about helping you define the non-negotiable...
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Episode 40
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16:50
Breaking the Cycle: Learning to Trust Yourself
Trusting your own intuition can feel impossible when you grew up with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder. Many of us were conditioned to override our gut feelings just to keep the peace—making it harder to make con...
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Episode 39
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21:18
Signs You Need Better Boundaries with Your Parent
Struggling to set boundaries with a parent who has borderline or narcissistic personality disorder? In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I break down five key signs that you need stronger boundaries—and share practical st...
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Episode 38
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14:18
One Year of Confident Boundaries: What I've Learned About Coaching, Community, and Growth
After a year of running Confident Boundaries alongside my therapy practice, I’m reflecting on the journey—what worked, what didn’t, and how I’ve evolved my approach to supporting adult children of BPD and NPD parents.Expanding beyond the...
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Episode 37
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34:14
When Your Toxic Parent Becomes a Grandparent to Your Kids
As the adult children of a parent with narcissistic or borderline personality disorder, becoming parents ourselves brings up a whole new set of challenges—especially when it comes to navigating the grandparent-grandchild relationship. ...
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Episode 36
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22:30
Adulting is Hard: Breaking the Cycle & Filling in the Gaps
Growing up with a parent who has borderline personality disorder (BPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) can have lasting emotional and practical impacts—some of which often go overlooked.In this episode, we dive into the...
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Episode 35
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15:23
The Good Mom vs. The Punishing Mom: Reflections on My Childhood with My Narcissist Mother
Growing up with a narcissistic or borderline parent means constantly navigating two versions of them—the loving, "good" parent and the punishing, unpredictable one. In this episode, I reflect on how caring for my sick daughter brought up memori...
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Episode 34
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21:42
Forgiveness Is Overrated—Now Acceptance? That’s Gold When You're Trying to Heal From a Parent with Narcissistic or Borderline Personality Disorder
If you've ever been told that you have to forgive in order to heal, I want you to know—that’s just not true. In this episode, I’m breaking down why forgiveness is overrated, especially when it comes to parents with borderline...
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Episode 33
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18:30
Breaking Free from Guilt When Dealing with Challenging Family Dynamics
Is overwhelming guilt getting in the way of setting boundaries with your borderline or narcissistic parent? You’re not alone. In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I dive deep into the emotional weight of guilt that so many adult childr...
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Episode 32
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20:20
10 Essential Steps for Healing from a Narcissistic or Borderline Parent
In this episode of You're Not Crazy, I’m sharing the 10 crucial steps every adult child of a narcissistic or borderline parent needs to take as a part of their healing journey. Whether you're just starting to recognize the imp...
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Episode 31
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36:02
You Need to Be the Villain in Your Toxic Parent's Story in Order to Take Back Control of Your Life and Heal
Being the adult child of a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder often means confronting the painful reality of being cast as the "villain" in their story. That s*cks, but learning to sit with this discomfort can help you ...
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Episode 30
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20:10
5 Toxic Traits I Developed Growing Up in an Emotionally Chaotic Home
In this episode of You’re Not Crazy, we’re diving into five toxic traits that I developed from growing up in an emotionally chaotic home—and more importantly, how I'm working on them. If you’ve ever struggled with people-pleasing, over...
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Episode 29
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16:49
Overcoming a Fear of Abandonment After Growing Up with a Borderline or Narcissistic Parent
If you grew up with a parent with borderline or narcissistic personality disorder, the fear of being abandoned by people you love might run deep. In this episode of You're Not Crazy, we unpack how toxic love from a parent impacts your ...
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Episode 28
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17:55
This Year Was All About Growth: What I'm Most Proud of and What I’m Focusing on in 2025
Today I’m reflecting on how I’ve grown this year and what I’m focusing on for 2025. From taking bold action before I felt “ready” to ending a toxic friendship and trusting myself more, I’m sharing the real, unfiltered moments that have shaped m...
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Episode 27
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22:08